HEADPHONEGATE!

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These new headphones are awful, giant pincers that produce sound. I feel as though I am receiving "The Claw" from Baron Von Raschke and I only have to wear the headphones for a few seconds before I start giving up the names and locations of Al Qaeda cells.
And how painful they are is nothing compared to how stupid they look -- 1/2 Dumbo ears, 1/2 lobsided orthodontic head-bridle.
How was I gudgeoned into making such a purchase? Look at this guy.

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He's not complaining. This guy loves his swell new headphones. A LOT. I wanted to be him when I saw the Maxell headphones in the bargain rack. And yet the image is a lie! A LIE! The headphones are photoshopped in.

The headphones are not even designed for human heads. This is why I feel like I need to admit that I am a witch before I take them off.

FOR SHAME, MAXELL.
FOR SHAME!

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